Dropping in after a long absence to let you know that there are some things we don't stand for. And since we are not shy to share those God forsaken things with you, we figured we'd let everyone in on a little secret.
Abercrombie & Fitch is gay.
If someone has told you otherwise- they hate you. Re-evaluate that friendship.
To back our point we've compiled a list of talking points to help you get through and dominate in a "Abercrombie is fucking lame" spoken battle with someone.
These are accurate points, people. The real shit. It's 100% accurate, 100% of the time.
Things you can assume about someone if they are wearing Abercrombie and Fitch:
- Almost always from the midwest. Or Europe. They've got all kinds of fucked up shit over there.
- Doesn't have a problem with wearing man sandals. Which is never okay. See Things That Should Have Never Existed.
- Choose Ed Hardy as an alternative lifestyle choice.
- Probably play lacrosse. LAX IS LYFE. This applies strictly to males.
- Totally a douchebag. In every way.
- Absolutely wears a shark tooth necklace.
- They think it's normal to gel their hair. Which ps - Not sure if you've seen Jersey Shore... but it's not.
- They're lazy as fuck. But that's no excuse.
- ...might be Israeli.
Here's the real skinny though -
A. Their CEO is a fucking DICK. It's awesome. He literally said, "People said we were cynical, that we were sexualizing little girls. But you know what? I still think those are cute underwear for little girls."
HUH? Underwear... and little girls... in the same sentence. Jesus Christ.
Or how about, "In every school there are the cool and popular kids, and then there are the not-so-cool kids."
Spoken like a true mother-fucker.
B. People might say that homies who wear Abercrombie & Fitch are preppy "followers" but honestly I gotta hand it to them... I think they have some serious bawls.
I mean... I would never be caught dead wearing Abercrombie & Fitch. I must be a real pussy.
Take it away boys,
Discount Knowledge
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